Friday, February 26, 2010
Look Ma - No hands
A nursing home official says Rose's pussy cat Mojo (AKA Fluffy), has been inconsolable. They have not yet determined whether her continued presence at the home poses a risk for the other residents.
"Many of our residents have conditions that could lead to their demise if they have too much fun or excitement. We try to avoid serving spicy food, or encouraging rousing games of Scrabble. We try to keep everything as boring as we can in order to prolong their lives and get more money from the families and the government.
A highlight of their morning is a nice glass of prune juice to wash down their all bran cereal. Afterwards they all gather in the common room where there are several public washrooms. They usually discuss their aches and pains as well as their bowel movements. It promotes a healthy rivalry and gives them something to live for," the nursing home source said.
To date Rose's family members have not responded to repeated messages left on their ipods and answering machines.
Boomer, custodian at "The Grove," as long time residents call it, was not available for comment but sources say he was trying to raise bail money and mumbled that Rose could always come to live with him if the Home
"boots her ass outa here". " It is rumored that Boomer often refers to the home as Shady GRAVE.
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